It is not an all clear day.
I am being threatened, yet again.
So, it is not all clear today.
Do not be surprised when I do not call upon you, perhaps not ever again. Because you have yet to know the truth because I have yet to write the truth.
It is of course, impossible to avoid all traffic camera’s. Something that is being unjustly asked of me to do.
We will not be having coffee and breakfast together. The undue pressure exerted upon my physical frame carrying extra weight has caused a creative stop-hold. I will not be eating.
What a terrible thing for someone to take away another person’s vision and eyesight.
I reserve the right to decide who and what manner a person is good for me. This has nothing to do with the color of their skin, sex, sexuality, religion, or any other manner. It is a brain thing.
So, when I see that someone has been placed to oversee me because they are straight, yet do not have a problem with – the best way I can describe it – being flirty with the same sex, I will of course, push back, buck, fight, have my guard up and so on. It is extremely inappropriate. It is a falsehood masquerading as acceptable. I have been greatly distressed, upset, unhappy, and angry because of it.
I will always push back against this person. I don’t know how many years it will take for me to say over and over, I do not like you like that. I never will.
How many years do I have to prove my sexuality?! How many years do I have to prove I am straight. What a terrible crime to commit on me and innocent person.
How many years must I live a hands-only life?!
Where is my justice?
To be clear and understood – I back my vehicle into my garage…so, I can open my door. I have shelves and garage-related items on the other side. If I did not back up I would not be able to open my door.
Clear?!
Sorry, Benedict Cumberbatch I will not be watching anymore Patrick Melrose. Please, do not take it personally. You are a great actor. It is always a pleasure to watch you perform, however there is an undesirable presence that has been allowed to enter my world because I watched Patrick Melrose.
As if because I watched a show about drug abuse it makes me an addict, too?! WRONG!
If you follow that line of thinking that would mean if you watch a show about cops, then you must be a cop. If you watched a show about Muslims that would make you a Muslim. If you watch a show about a family that would make you a family. If you watched a show about a homosexual couple that would make you a homosexual couple.
STUPIDEST LINE OF THINKING! WHAT BRAIN DECIDED THAT WAS A SMART IDEA?!
If you only understood beyond the forefront it is actually quite flattering.
One way I lost weight before was to go on a liquid diet. It has many names, a detox, Master cleanse, the lemonade diet – it is a diet. It has nothing to do with control.
If you’ll notice Benedict Cumberbatch in Patrick Melrose does not have the same muscle mass, he had in BBC’s Sherlock Holmes.
How terribly flattering, yet again for me. As it seems he has taken my weight loss and means to lose weight and used it as inspiration for a character.
It is unbelievably flattering.
However, because of the external pressure being placed on me I cannot watch Patrick Melrose anymore.
As always, I will still be interested in Benedict Cumberbatch’s acting. I am still an Anglophile. I still adore all things British. As both my parents have British heritage and backgrounds. More than that, I like it.
I wanted to have tea the other day because in my head spa I was making tea and an almond scone with cream, yet what was delivered to me was weight and heavy mass not flavor and taste.
Again, to be clear, I cannot conceive children. Uterus should know that by now. The only children I have are covered in fur and have four legs. Maurice, The Handsome. Lambert, The Good. And, Murphy, The Magnificent – The Brilliant.
So, yes, I will leave lights and music on for them while I am away to ease the separation, calm their nerves, and comfort them in my absence.
This is knee-jerk reporting that I have to do. It is not what I want to write about.
No food. I am too fat still. Too heavy. To depressed and unhappy because of it.
It is not all clear today.
WE - DO NOT AGREE! 