Coffee and Breakfast

Sims4, you are taking up too much of my time.

If you think after what happened yesterday that I am going to watch any more Electric Dreams, you are mistaken.

Just like Star Wars is off too.

This is what I mean by allowing situations and circumstances to be allowed it has an effect on everyone and everything else, and how I think, feel, and see next.

How is that someone is allowed to put sleeping powder in my laundry detergent, so that when wearing clothes I am forced to pass out.  Nine hours later and I can barely get out of bed.  Twelve hours later and I am still groggy and cannot function, or get any work done.

I am so tired of having to be fucking pissed every day!

It is not the way business is to be done.  It is not the way any business should be managed.

In case anyone is wondering, this is not The White House, I am not following any of the President’s.

David Wolfe, the absence of my writing to you speaks volumes.

I do not dream in food anymore.

I am about to spread news of my dissatisfaction with companies that do not deliver products I order, problems with products, and issues with products.  Regardless of where I purchase them.  Because no matter from whom, or where I purchase a product should have no bearing on where I buy gas, where I park my car, what door I use to open or close no matter where I am, where I exit from, what lane I use to drive, etc!

HOLLYWOOD, YOU KNOW NOTHING!

FUCKING PISSED!

Coffee and Breakfast

How does somebody get to have the right to place sleep spray in laundry detergent and deliver it to me!

It will take me weeks, months if not years to get rid of all the problems!  If it can happen to me it can happen to other people.

BEWARE!

I am not done yet!

YUCK!!!!!!!!!!

SHUT THE FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL UP!!!

STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY FUCKING HOUSE, YOU STUPID FUCKS!!!!

Do Good

Do Good – Not Evil

Do Good – Deeds

Do Good – Not Harm

Do Good – Works

Do Good – Love, With More Than Everything In You

Do Good – Writing for yourself, for others, for the world, for history to learn from and not repeat itself again and again, and again and again.

Do Good – Art

Do Good – Creative Things

Do Good – Theater

Do Good – Film work

Do Good –  Mindful Thinking

Do Good – Representations

Do Good – Caring for yourself, for others, for the world to know darkness and evil will NOT be tolerated, not now, not ever.

Do Good – Laughter, so the world can know joy exists.  So, every person can see the light from within is impossible to diminish.

Do Good – Health

Do Good – Work

Do Good – Eating

Do Good – Drinking

Do Good – Actions With Purpose

Do Good – Talking and Speaking

Do Good – Active Thoughtful Listening

Do Good – Speeches

Do Good – Loving

Do Good – Relationships

Do Good – Parenting

Do Good – Rest

Do Good – Wakeful Purpose

Do Good – Not Shame

Do Good – Not Humiliation

Do Good – Not Cheating

Do Good – Respect

Do Good – Sincerity

Do Good – Happiness

Do Good – Dreams and Dreaming

Do Good – Serenity

Do Good – Sincere Apologies

Do Good – Holding Your Tongue, so you do not have to apologize later.

Do Good – Without Fear

Do Good – Admitting When You Are Wrong

Do Good – Grace

Do Good – Peace

Do Good – Fighting For What’s Right

Do Good – Balance

Do Good – Beliefs

Do Good – Believing

Do Good – For Every Person Regardless of Sex, Creed, Religion, Color, Nationality, Sexual Orientation, and Body and Shape.

Do Good – Decisions

Do Good – With What You Have

Do Good – Do Not Destroy

Do Good – At preserving what you have, so you do not have to live with regret as some things can never be replaced.

 

Declassified Files: A Series Of True Events Being Brought to Light – 1/19/2018

TCS: Dressed as an older lady in the office section of the store – Kaitlin Olson unhappy to be there, tried to get me to have a conversation with her.  She was so unhappy and somewhat violent, she seemed like a person to stay away from.  So, I did not spend more time than I needed to with her.

I am so disgusted with all the deceptions!  Stay out of my bed!  I have not invited any man – let alone a WOMAN!  To my bed!!!!

The reason the Bluetooth pushed the cum button, spoke in a male voice and said boobs were his favorite is because of Michael Wayne Brown.  Near the end of my relationship and near marriage to MWB when we had sex he would cum between my boobs.  I have no idea how many women MWB slept with while we were engaged.  He slept with our agent, my headshot was on their wall, to get and book jobs.  MWB is uncredited in Edward Scissorhands.  MWB is uncredited in There Is Something About Mary.

The last man to ever love me, loved to see and watch my face as he kicked me.  He would not knock me to the ground like a dog and kick me, he used to kick me while standing up.  Sole to sternum.  He received great satisfaction watching me unable to breathe, watching as the air exhaled from my lungs.

The police could not protect me which is why I never reported him.  This was the early 90’s not 2018.  MWB knew too many people.  He had connections to people.  He had a hold on me that has not left me to this day.

So, going from an abusive relationship, to years of solitude because no man wanted me no matter how hard I tried, to being ripped open, all my female reproductive organs removed to be replaced with a cum button, to being tricked with a skin suit and mind-control after being stitched from the inside out, I know with great certainty there is not a possibility for me to ever love again.

This is not a life.

I have standards.  I cannot be with a man who is willing to take advantage of me.  Jimmy Tan, Eddie, and other men who were only seen with me because they knew I would buy their drinks.  There is only so long I can let that go on.  I am not that kind of girl.

Jimmy Tan who called me in the parking lot at Target after I was released from the ER and the first car “accident”.

If you think I am changing my husband’s profession in a game you are dumber than you look.  You want me to believe I saw a woman who is wearing a waitress uniform singing about She used to be mine – you are dumber than you look.  No Means No!

If you think I am changing the kind of cat litter I buy because of the picture on the product, you are dumber than you look.

The fact that I have to share these personal pains and torments – is inexcusable and unforgivable.

Stop sending celebrities and actors to deliver goods to my home.  I am sick of seeing famous people, who are better off than me upset, angry, disgusted, and unhappy to see me.

Why would anyone want to be famous or a celebrity after being treated the way I have?  To be opened up as if my whole life is for the world to choose, take apart, edit, alter, and reinvent.

Keep your fingers, I don’t and never wanted them.  You cannot alter my vision like that!

Stay out of my BED!!!!

 

Declassified Files: A Series of True Events Being Brought to Light – 1/18/2018 Part Three

Summertime 2014, Lunch break: Cypress Point Park, sitting on a bench looking out over the water trying to imagine a world and life beyond my then role, I hung my head in sadness and depression from a lack of love.  As I walked back to my car, an old man on a bicycle wearing the google glass eye went the opposite direction.

David Wolfe never even said, hi.

Declassified Files: A Series of True Events Being Brought to Light – 1/18/2018 Part Two

July 2014 starting my shift at The Container Store, Anna Paquin as “Jamie” went over the announcements.  I interrupted her, and corrected her which threw her off because I was stronger than her, more sure of myself than her, it filled the whole room.  “Jamie” looked to “Sarah” for support and direction.  “Sarah”said, Keep going.

You see other’s may have been able to book jobs I never got, but they cannot take away from the me that is deep within.  For if I wanted to, there isn’t anyone I couldn’t “Wipe the flor with”.  It is who I have always been.

Ask David Wolfe.

Upon not knowing the definition of a MILF because why would I know the definition of a MILF, I was not a teen-ager when American Pie was released, I asked everyone at Thespis to tell me the definition.  I couldn’t understand why it was such a taboo topic.  You don’t know the answer to a question, you simply ask, right?  David Wolfe finally told me after asking and asking everyone.  He had to whisper it as he walked past as if almost ashamed or embarrassed to tell me, Mother I’d Like to Fuck.

As he left I thought, ok, and…

Here’s my point to be clear: I was heavy and overweight when David spoke MILF, but as I in my previous blog described myself I am one part Mae West and one part Ruth Buzzy.  Funny and sexy.  As overweight as I was I could have had any man I wanted because in my mind I was not in my right body.  I was not an overweight woman.  I was hot as hell.

Also, much has been spoken about me seeing red before.  I spoke about this with friends while I understand now I was being recorded.  If I ever get to write all the stories that lead up to The Container Store the world will be forever ashamed for separating a most glorious truth.  The world will forever be ashamed of taking one moment of entertainment or pleasure from the separation of something that cannot be replicated, engineered, or designed.

David Wolfe and I used to argue – every time we saw each other.  Also, we used to look at each other, and the entire world fell away.  PJ called it mind-fucking.  We argued one time, I was so upset with him I literally saw red.  He went storming out the door.  It took everything in me not to follow after him to make it better.  There was such a pull.

The Bluetooth knows this:  Backstage David had Alisha on his lap in what appeared as a kiss, I walked in on them.  She got up and left.  I went charging up to David for I was going to show him what a real kiss was like!  Then, the thought occurred to me, what if he really liked Alisha after all?  In an instant I stopped.  Because I loved David with the best of me.  If he preferred Alisha over me, I had to let him be happy.  Even if it came at the expense of my own heart break.

Later that day or later on in the performances, I walked backstage and David entered at the same time.  The look on his face was such sadness it instantly broke me.  Quite literally down the middle everything fell down.  David had been speaking and spending a lot of time talking with other people in the previous days and not with me.  He had been spending a lot of time talking with Stacy.  But, in that moment when I saw his face all I wanted to do was make it all ok for him.  I asked him if he was ok.

I will not explain the rest.  I doubt he ever knew how he broke me.

There is an impossibility that has existed between David and I.

I thought it was David that smiled at me at the bar touching my knee in such a way that everything just went away.  However, I no longer know.  He has lost a friend for life because of what has been allowed to happen.  Yet, the past still remains.

Also, I believe I was handled by a psychiatrists who did not have the same energy level as me, and could not keep up with me.  So, she decided to keep drugging me to make me sleep for days.  Shame on you.

There was something else I was going to write, probably about all the times I have been drugged.

Perhaps, there will be a part three today.