Taking a nap today I wake up full of relief. As if someone and someone’s thoughts have vacated the premises. Giving me back freedom of my mind.
It has been asked of me to figure out and “out” a famous person.
I will do no such thing.
If a person wishes their sex life to be out in the public, they can do it themselves. I will not do it for them. I am tired of doing other people’s dirty work for them.
Case in point, I deleted apps from my electronic devices so that I could have freedom of thought. It has created a stop hold to read false new stories and false publications.
I have been led to the point of watching Silkwood. Please try and guess why. I ask you to think for a moment and guess why I would be surrounded by people who would have an advantage or any interest whatsoever in me watching Silkwood.
Give up?
Closing my eyes, I can barely type this as I go because the very idea is so ludicrous, idiotic, imbecilic, so unbelievably harmful I cannot stand it, nor do I have any room or patience for this line of thinking.
Yeah, I have zero tolerance and I do not apologize for it.
Guess who stars in Silkwood? Meryl Streep. Guess what storyline “someone” would like to “play out” if I watch a movie where Meryl Streep’s character dies? They want to act out in real-time an assassination or hit against a real person. A contest between Nicole Kidman and Meryl Streep.
Dumb doesn’t cover this idiocy.
Guess where this might ever be appropriate?
When I lived in Seminole in the 80’s I was cleaning out the garage. A van drove by and I immediately stopped what I was doing. Watching as the van drove by. My back was up. I told myself to go back to work. The van drove by again. This time it felt worse than the first. I felt the need to get inside – QUICKLY. I shut the garage door, walked/ran into the house, locked the door, shut the curtains, turned off the lights, checked the back door, then listened at the front door.
Hearing nothing, I went into my room, locked the door, and waited for it to return to normal. I have yet to see that day.
I feared and felt as though it was an attempt on my life. I felt as though they were going to kill and/or kidnap me.
Going back and forth through my writings, I have arrived at the conclusion that a person or persons placed Michael Brown in my path. I do not know why other than to see if I would take to him, an older man.
Guessing I had Daddy issues.
Remembering a time, I gave Michael Brown a test. It turns out my instinct was correct. I told Michael I didn’t like people or like to be around people who drink. Then, I watched his reaction. We were in a parking lot of a restaurant. He took off going a million miles. Leaving me without a ride or way to get home. Had I understood my mind better then and what it is capable of that day would have been the last day Michael ever saw me again. I tested him to see his reaction. I tested him, he failed.
I just forgot to listen to myself.
It’s true I did not grow up with a lot of alcohol around the house.
When I worked at Visionworks, I had another job as a hostess at Tex-Mex. Walking from my job in a lab where I wore a lab coat I’d change into a Mexican layered skirt, off shouldered white shirt, and sash in the restroom. I was cute.
Usually a co-worker would drive me home, I never had a car or the car. Michael who was unemployed most of the time always had the car.
One shift I worked as a cocktail waitress walking past some people without thinking I wiped the salt off the man’s hand – cleaning up. Nope, I was eighteen and had not yet had a shot of tequila. I was not asked to cocktail waitress again.
Why can’t I just be let alone. To live my life without any of them.
Give me back my mind and body.
WE - DO NOT AGREE! 