The destructive nature living this life has had on my mind, my brain, and my body.
Would you like to live a life where every non-clocked in minute is spent in bed rest?! Unable to enjoy life or the world?!
Locked away, cut off from the world?! It is not worth living.
No, I will not take down the photos of my cats. I am so grieved.
No, I will never love David ever again.
Such plans I had for this place and my life when I moved here. All the things I was going to do. Plans to make this place a home. Plans to do all the things I hadn’t been able to do because I was taking care of my mother and family – are gone. Have been gone and destroyed when I discovered all the cameras. Gone when I discovered it was not possible for me to have a moment, not one moment 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year of privacy. I am not able to have any privacy whatsoever. At all.
In addition, I am left for years and years without any love or the possibility of ever being loved in the flesh.
You are not sorry.
Stop lying to me.
I am nothing but dollar signs to these people.
I want you to consider the fact that these people have gone unchecked for decades. It is more than possible that their brain-waves and thinking is what actually interfered with me when I was just eighteen.
It could have been their notion, their idea, their assessment, their conclusion that made its way into my thinking rather than the other way around.
You need, and they need to consider, be more careful, and remove themselves. They know not the possible and probable harm that could happen just by thinking around me.
Because this keeps coming back to me. It seems you are on to a false lead.
It looked like weather. That is not what it is.
There is a hurry. (?)
I see you’ve stored your brain in your underpants again. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that added weight, padding, and excessive force only damage the product slowing and weighing it down.
I would fire the people responsible for the improperly balanced weight. This priceless commodity is above such idiocies. You are causing the stock not to soar, but to be traded at less than fair market values.
Way to think that through.
Going commando that gets the job done.
Viscus.
However, I am uncertain as to the authenticity.
Months.
Sooner if you don’t listen. Something just went frantic.
It is hard for me to differentiate between what is passed on to the proper channels and correct departments and what is left to be determined later.
I was trying to fall asleep the morning of 8/4/2018 as per usual there is someone in my head trying to keep me up, so I look tired. It is utter bollocks. It is abuse and abusive. Then, I saw something. I’ve been talking about it in my head to people since it happened.
It looked like weather. As best as I can describe it. It looked like a massive weather system rectangle in shape very far away in the distance. If you looked at space and time through a continuum (not entirely sure why I use this word, trying to describe a picture of what I saw) as a massive tunnel (trying to give you the imagery of dimensionality) all of a sudden I saw this wall of weather cloudy, smoky, pollution, airy, yet thick, massive in size perhaps three stories high bigger than an apartment building. I started to take a look – only way to describe looking, seeing in my head – when chatterbox, talking man interrupts me thinking – SSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
It was gone.
The threat was different from others I’ve seen. And, I have not been able to see too much detail. Why?! Too many people. Too many people surrounding me. It’s like being able to receive television channels without having cable that is what living here and being me is like for me. So, if I am stuck with someone who is going through a specific problem there is a transfer problem. I don’t know how many times I have to write about this to get this corrected.
It is like being courteous to a co-worker or someone, yet in real life you keep a distance, an emotional distance, you don’t get too involved for so many reasons. A very specific reason for me has to do with how it affects my head, my thinking, how it makes me feel, how it creates an environment. I used to be able to remove myself from people, or jobs that do not live in my well of truth.
I’ve tried to revisit this wall of weather. I write wall because it was so massive and flat. Men. Mostly in their forties, thirties, few younger and older. This is the best way I can describe what I saw – if they met or were hanging out at a dance club where it wasn’t entirely filled with loud music, so they could talk. Credit cards. Havoc. To see what they could hack and more and get away with on a global scale. For vengeance. For fun. For the thrill. I saw drugs and alcohol. Computers.
Quiet, all directional its true.
It went away until now. Now, I am troubled. Anxious. Heavy worry.
WE - DO NOT AGREE! 