Do you ever get tired of good?
If your life is good. If your job is good. If a man is good. If a movie. a song, or a book is good. If a purchase is good. If your food is good, is that good enough for you?
The problem is – for me – it is never good enough. I want exceptional. It is not a need or desire from a place of discontent or dissatisfaction. It is a part of me that simply cannot tolerate anything less than more. More than good. More than good enough. More than average. More than status-quo. More than being able to blend in.
The problem is my whole being cannot deny the light within me, nor can I accept anything less than what I know to be possible. Having to pretend to be someone I am not, having someone else’s mantel placed upon me as if it is my burden to bear is always seen as a lesser version of me.
There has always been something in me that is greater than my circumstance(s). I was born with it. God gave it to me as a gift. As He does for every person, He gives every person a gift when born.
It is not possible for me to live with mediocre. My spirit cringes. My soul aches. I want to rip my flesh off in anguish at the loss.
What good is a good meal if it is merely measured out ingredients? What good is a movie if it does not make you uncomfortable in its truth, or bleeds anguish bearing its vulnerable soul? What good is a man if he is not in physical form? What good is a man if he is unwilling to learn from you, or believe in the vision you see in him?
What good is good?
If you are willing and able to settle for good, then congratulations and good luck to you, you will have a life. However, I cannot settle for anything less. There is the brightest light that burns within me every day, all the time.
Good is not enough for me.