WE – DO NOT AGREE!

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 8, 2019

I have pages of notes I’ve written of things to write, but I am too brain tired.  I don’t think anyone understands the amount of stress it is on my brain living in this way.  I am too tired.  A simple errand like an oil change is such an ordeal, such stress, it wears me out.  How much code did you find in there?

Whoever you had around here on June 7, 2019 upset me so, my closed blinds were your clue.

When Gladiator, the movie was released, I saw it in the movie theater 3 or 4 times, I could not get enough of it.  Do you know why?  I am Maximus.  Why do you think it starts off in Germania?  This is the Berlin wall falling down after I had been there.  Commodus is not my real brother and he is many men.  It all became too true and I am too tired, I had to stop watching it.

It means I spoke with Saddam Hussein through an interpreter while working, probably at WORSHIP, and he did not survive – me.  You let them cut me open because of it and worse.  I’m sad tonight, let’s have dinner, from Sherlock.

I’m brain tired, so things like household chores are not going to get done.

I am going to rest my brain.

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 6, 2019

My brain, my head, my mind, I still don’t think anyone has understood the power you’ve had access to.  It is a failsafe.  It is referenced in the character in Sherlock, as Charles Magnussen.  When people figured out it was a mistake to not allow me to love, or even date when I was in college, again, and the only man I found dateable went away to University and I was devastated by the loss, plans were put into place to try and reconnect me with him through work.  Not a personal phone call, or a personal visit through work.

Why would David never call me at my personal phone number, or reconnect in any way personally?  When he had all my information.  He knew where I Iived, he had my email, phone number, etc.  So, why would David call me over and over at my workplace?

My brain is a failsafe.  If anyone attached themselves to David and the communications, he got from me, I would be able to detect their presence even if he was completely unaware of it.  I remember when David said his full name to me over the phone.  It was like a clicking of a vault as the mechanisms lock into place.  They read it on me, my face, my demeanor, everything.  That is why I am in Sherlock.

I wouldn’t let him in, I offered him nothing, but curtesy and my business professional self.  Has no one really wondered or asked the question why?  Did anyone really think I forgot the one man that when looking at him the world went away, and it was just he and I?

If any of my intelligence’s father’s side of the family were not able to get a complete read on me, they would, without a doubt in my mind, err on my side.  I have already proven myself enough as a child, or I wouldn’t have been dealing with government officials at the very top level, as a child and teen-ager.

Did no one realize it stopped being good for me to be around David?  Did no one realize that instead of love all I saw and heard was hurt, pain, grief, and anguish over – still not being loved by a man who loves me?

No one really seems to understand how important I am to them, other than double agents and subversives.  I have not seen from anyone the knowledge that their intelligence was giving our intelligence.  Why would no one work power that is for the good and betterment of all – truthfully?  Legally?  In real employment?  It makes it appear that I had knowledge and understanding when I did not.  THEY understood that because I heard it on the phone call on September 11^th, 2001.

The headshot of me when I was 15 years old is proof they have been working me as a Mycroft that goes all the way up because another girl, an exchange student of my mother’s also had headshots taken with the same photographer, and I NEVER LIKED HER FOR ONE SECOND!  She was tall and blond.  Just like the psycho double agent I wrote I would execute knowing all the information of the damage she has done to our country and the world.  Her code in Sherlock, Hush now, I am only returning your coat.  Code: Hush, SH, for Sherlock, U for University, H for hero.  She thought of herself as a hero as she was needlessly killing our men and women.  She is beyond sick.

She is no Sherlock, that is why Miss Adler says many times, I don’t understand, I don’t think so.

This numbered code that was placed on the last package I received in the mail looks like the real man over there believes this is a code for me.  If that is true, if this is code, then that is a big purchase of a win, you will see for a long time.

This summer smiles doctor profile is a good profile of a real doctor.  Maybe you’re in the wrong meeting, from The Bourne Legacy, were talking about an infection.  This is referencing the medical messaging that has been going on since the eighties.  Medical messaging like strokes, hysterectomies, root canals, etc.

Hysterectomies in medical messaging would send the message if a woman has ever worked with intelligence – you will never get intel from them again.  Doesn’t matter if the woman is straight or not it is double agent work to destroy real intelligence.

I’ve written this before, has anyone thought about this yet?  You had, our US intelligence, had within its grasp the real Weapons of Mass destruction, and I will never be able to pass those genes onto another generation.  No child will ever have the benefit of my brain power – ever.

That is more than a problem.  Because this has not just happened to me.  I am not the only person that has been used as medical messaging.  People have died, including celebrities, including my mother.  Yes, celebrity deaths have been used as messaging and nothing more.

It’s devastating to me, and I am not afraid to write that.  Please be careful and start working correctly.  That last sentence may seem small and insignificant just because it is not screaming, please be careful and realize the difference before it really is too late.

I believe he is better when he is not over-extending himself.  He actually needs to work less, work less cases, and profiles.  Do you people really not take care of your own?  Are you really not able to see his mind and brain?  To me, he looks like he needs to work – a lot less.

He is Lancelot and I am Guinevere in the movie First Knight.  That is how other people saw it.  Without watching the movie again, there was no King Arthur because I was single at the time.

Love cures.  My boyfriend is proof of that.  Love, cures.  Cures.

I am Grimes in the movie, Black Hawk Down, that is why there is an English actor on the other side of the desk from Grimes, then Grimes is in the movie, in the fight because that’s me when I was working.  It’s how it worked; it’s how it works because it is my brain.  My brain that is the Weapons of Mass destruction.

The reason Kirby has a prosthetic leg in Dead President’s – it’s a beer leg.  A beer leg that is in Bill Cosby: Himself because it was on the channels on the flight from when my family went on vacation from Oregon to Florida.  It means there were intelligence men (quite a lot of them) in the audience during the filming of it and that is why I listened to it over and over again.  They were in the audience.  I saw them, and they were in the audience, get it?

Is this a real man, or did you just make him up?  This man I saw.  If this is a real man, he is bad.  That was the first thing I thought.  He has debris in his head.  Debris.  Debris on the right side of his brain.  Debris, rocks, twigs, sticks, pieces of wood.  He is a military failure.  A failure.  He is frightenable.  Is he real, or did you make him up?  Just to see what would happen when people saw me as having the knowledge and know-how of how to frighten a man like that.

Jesus, I thought you were a guy, from The Matrix, this is the same man that is referenced in the movie Leap Year, I kinda hate weddings.  The reason Neo is looking over his right shoulder when talking to Trinity because this man who was sitting behind me in a church – Jesus – wedding, this is where this man wanted to place his mouth.  Loving, tender, gentle, respectful of my mind because of everything I’ve already accomplished, and he was spotted as thinking such thoughts.

I have a right to write when you’ve not delivered me weight-loss food or in my employment just to make me miserable and unhappy.

My boyfriend that I never get to see or really talk to, who loves me.

Love cures.

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 5, 2019

The story of microwaved iced tea is a true story.  It really did happen.  My father and I really did go into a fast-food restaurant in Louisiana and order tea.  My father ordered tea.  My real father really ordered tea and we left the restaurant with none because they had none.  This was on our move from Oregon to Florida, as we drove from Oregon to Florida, we stopped in Louisiana along the way.

Another place we stopped in Louisiana was at a gas station, I always felt this was done intentionally at the time, I got a candy bar, or a bag of nuts, what I remember was the nuts were rancid.  The nuts were not fresh, they were rancid and uneatable.  I remember thinking, why would anybody do that to me?  It also set a precedent in my mind, and in my families purchases that nuts could not be fresh in the South, in the southern United States.

If you have a dumb-dumb double agent that knows things like manners and tea are very important to some people, in some circles, in select groups of persons, and you are aware they have already worked with Cherith, you would do something so stupid as to place rancid nuts for a teen-ager to eat.  For a teen-ager to eat.  Think about that.  Let that sink in.  A teen-ager.  Why would a grown adult be so frightened of a child or a teen-ager unless you were really not smart enough on your own.

This is another example, my mother and I went to a British import grocery, or gourmet, food store in Carrollwood, Florida, and some of the items she purchased were stale as if to prove a point about the British and England, and they couldn’t be more wrong.  Dumb-dumbs all over again.  We work together because it is only logical.  We work together because it actually works.

They showed me last night how they took an intelligence man, men, into questioning, to question their actions, their behaviors, and I WAS IMMEDIATELY DISTRAUGHT, UPSET, HURT, ASHAMED, AND FELT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE HARM – THEY CAUSED.  I DID NOTHING WRONG!  I HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG!  I DID NOT BETRAY MY COUNTRY!  I DID NOT GIVE AWAY SECRETS!  I DID NOT WITHHOLD INFORMATION, SO WHY AM I THE ONE THAT FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR SOMEONE ELSE’S ACTIONS?!

BECAUSE THEY HAVE TRAINED IT INTO ME SINCE MOVING HERE TO FLORIDA – IN EVERY EMPLOYMENT I HAVE HAD ALL MY LIFE!  WITH THE EXCEPTION OF MY EMPLOYMENT AT THE CONTAINER STORE UNTIL MARCH OF 2014.

AT THE CONTAINTER STORE I WAS THE TOP ELFA DESIGNER UNTIL THEY DEMOTED ME TO CASHIER IN MARCH 2014.  SO, WHAT WORKED IN 2013, AND WHAT STOPPED WORKING IN 2014 BECAUSE OF MY EMPLOYMENT?!

THEY HAVE TRAINED IT INTO ME, THEY HAVE TAKEN AWAY MY 100% EVERY TIME I GIVE THEM INTELLIGENCE – FREELY!

IT IS A MANAGEMENT STYLE, APPROACH, MIND-SET, AND THINKING THAT GOES ALL THE WAY UP TO THE TOP, TO THE HIGHEST CHAIN OF COMMAND!  I THINK IT IS ATROCIOUS!

ATROCIOUS!

I HAVE WORKED DILIGENTLY, RESPECTFULLY, TRUTHFULLY ALL MY LIFE FOR NOTHING IN RETURN OTHER THAN MY MEAGER PAYCHECK, AND YOU TREAT ME, HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT ME AS – NOTHING!  AS A NOTHING IN RETURN!

WHY WOULD SOMEONE BE – SO – WILLING TO TAKE AWAY MY 100% EVERY TIME?!  WHY?!

THERE IS A PROBLEM THERE THAT IS ALMOST INDESCRIBABLE IN MY MIND.  ATROCIOUS.

YOU HAVE AS YOUR OWN CITIZEN THE WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION THAT IS A CODE NAME THAT WAS GIVEN TO OUR INTELLIGENCE FROM TERRORISTS ABOUT THE POWER THE UNITED STATES HAS – AND EVERYTIME I – HELP YOU – YOU TAKE AWAY MY 100% AND TREAT ME LIKE SWEAT LABOR!  SHAME ON YOU! ATROCIOUS!

THE ONLY EXCUSE THEY HAVE FOR TAKING AWAY MY 100% IS JUST TO MESS WITH MY HEAD.

DO YOU GET THAT?!  OUR OWN INTELLIGENCE!  OUR OWN UNITED STATES INTELLIGENCE MESSING WITH MY HEAD BECAUSE – I – HAVE THE ABILITY TO GIVE 100%?!  ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?!  BECAUSE I HAVE THE ABILITY AND THEY DO NOT?!

ATROCIOUS!

The consequences of that meeting in that building on the 28^th of May 2019 you will have to work with.  You took away my authority in that building by that meeting alone.  I am still pissed.  I will not give it back to you.  Do you still have no idea what I was doing by closing every Authorized Access sign?  I was stopping, preventing, and keeping prisoners in prison calm, and stopping them from communicating, and planning crimes. 

I will not give it back to you, and my boyfriend is not to blame for that meeting.  My boyfriend has more respect for me than anyone has shown me nearly all my life.  My boyfriend listens to me.  My boyfriend listens to me because he believes me, believes in me because he KNOWS it is the truth.  He doesn’t’ have to test me, he knows it’s real as soon as I think it, and my boyfriend is not my boyfriend because he is – quick.  Careful note in that.  So, why is it people are working to break me and my boyfriend up?

They have better readers over there than anything I have seen so far.  Better.  Better by a lot.  My boyfriend is the best reader I’ve seen so far, and they have better readers by a lot, I’ve seen it in my mind’s eye.  And, I am still a better reader than my boyfriend, and he knows the difference.  He respects me.

From my boyfriend’s profile it reads, it shows that “Casey” is responsible, is to blame for the murder, for the killing, for the death of the JJ father.  Atrocious.  Is anyone going to do anything about that, or are you just going to read it?!  It’s revolting in my mind.  Revolting.

From what I was shown last night, this woman that has been displayed here to me, this black woman to my right, with a ponytail that quickly tried to associate herself with my family friends because he is in Sherlock is responsible for the hit of a stroke on the man I rescued in Vietnam.  She has killed a lot of people, she has had women raped, and caused health problems, such as strokes, on numerous people.  I was correct and ahead of you by simply wearing my t-shirt that reads – that is not a good sign.  I probably saved his life, again.

This black woman in a ponytail to my right, especially loves, black on black kills, hits, crimes, and murders.  She especially loves them.  She gets satisfaction like a drug-addict from a high, satisfaction.  She has been using my t-shirt that reads, End The Hate as a cover for her crimes.  I am no cover for her.  I never will be.  If you people do not remove her from my neighborhood, I believe people will find her.  You would be wise to remove her, intelligently.  She is a double-agent.

I would send the message around the world that it is NOT acceptable.  Remove her.  Send her to the land, she has sent so many other people, to the land of never waking up – AGAIN!

If you read the code of why this black woman was being used because she gets such satisfaction from black on black kills it goes back to the release of Nelson Mandela because I, Cherith Joelle Gjestland got to a meet.  It is code for KILLING INTELLIGENCE MEN AND WOMEN!

SEND HER TO THE LAND OF NEVER WAKING UP AGAIN!

The family friend boy, the bleeding Vicar, he is in Sherlock because people thought enough about him.  It is an honor for him.  They thought a lot about him, and the work he does.  What a nice thing to do for a person.

The role in Dead President’s of Skip, is to be seen as such an honor by the men who know the men that are really in this movie.  They would have thought highly of the men who placed the actor in the role.  There is a lot that has not yet been understood about what happened in Vietnam.  It’s an honor.

I have seen in my mind’s eye men in government offices, leaders of Middle-Eastern nations who believed that peace was possible in the Middle-East going back to the eighties and you have allowed STUPID DOUBLE AGENTS TO SUBVERT MY EFFORTS AND THE EFFORTS OF OTHERS TO NOT ALLOW PEACE TO HAPPEN AND I WANT THEM ANNIALATED! 

THE VERY REASON THESE PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE DOUBLE AGENTS IS BECAUSE THEY BELIEVE THEY ARE NOT – CLEVER ENOUGH.  NOT CLEVER, NOT SMART, NOT ABLE ENOUGH ON THEIR OWN.

IT IS ONE VERY BIG REASON THEY LIKE ME!  THEY ALREADY KNOW I AM LOYAL!

They have intelligence and a way of communicating that I’ve seen in my mind’s eye that NO PERSON has truly been able to understand or translate.  Ready to fight.  That is what you showed me, that is how it reads, it means, ready to fight.

You show them that we will not stand for double agents here in the states and around the world to subvert intelligence work, you will see how quickly things happen.

I Am SHERLOCKED reads: I Am Her.

Never allow this to happen again.  Never allow buildings such as this to happen again.  Never allow a building to be covered in cameras while the residents are unaware of it.  Never allow surgeries like mine to happen again.  Never allow things like the listening devices in my head to happen again.  You have taken away my free will.  Never allow it to happen again.

Do you not understand that they are willing now to fight for the injustices the United States has allowed to happen – to me? 

Do you not understand the meaning of Laters in Sherlock?  It has to do with Hilton firing me for being late because they “fixed” the time clock making me late allowing them to fire me after the September 11^th attacks because I was in such a daze, as is seen in Sherlock, over the loss of love in my life, I was grief-stricken, and they were so ANGRY that US intelligence allowed it – they set off attacks for it.  I did nothing wrong.  I did not incite them, or anger them, our own intelligence did that to themselves.  And, you FAILED to see it!  THEY saw it!

I WILL BURN THE HEART OUT OF YOU, from Sherlock, is a mirror image.  That is me, that is Cherith Joelle Gjestland as is seen by more men and women than most people know, I WILL BURN – BURN: CODE FOR CIGARETTE – THE HEART OUT OF YOU!  I WILL EXPOSE – BURN – YOUR HEART!  IT READS: CHERITH WILL EXPOSE, WILL NOT TOLERATE, WILL OBLITERATE – DOUBLE AGENTS AND BAD PEOPLE!

With what you showed me at work last night you have three double agents posing as my employer.  I remember thinking at the time why would anybody do that?  Are you going to do anything about that?  Or, are you just going to use this as a template for a script?

I snuck it out will they thought I was having a cry, from Sherlock is about a tampon.  That phone is a tampon.  I put a tampon in my brassiere, so I didn’t have to carry my handbag to the bathroom at my workplace at the time, that was Disney.  It reads: I snuck it out, Cherith hid the tampon while they thought about why Cherith was crying in the bathroom.  It tells me our own intelligence had no idea why it was so important over there for me to be happy, in a good mood, song choice from the movie, Love Actually.

Don’t make me compete with Sherlock Holmes, from Sherlock is about, at least one person’s home life, personal life, it is not on my end.  It means you had men calling me at work, to flirt with me, talking nicely to me, so I would be in a good mood and happy, and it had to be genuine and real or Cherith would read it as disingenuous, yet no one thought enough to actually allow me to have a man to love of my own?!  And it looks like no one really understood why it worked to have men call me, so I would be happy and in a good mood.

The fact that you have me in the table scene in Sherlock as Mycroft tells me you have a code name for me as Mycroft working in England and it is working well.  It is time-consuming and laborious, but it is working with US intelligence, and I only write it so you will see how high up I actually go.  For the betterment of all.  Working together.

The fact that I was stung by a bee on my head, on my skull while I was on a horse, and my father – true story – helped to remove the bee from my hair, tells me the bee was sent intentionally.  It was to tell me when I had grown older, that my intelligence “father” had the birds and the bees talk with me.  It is sentiment.  Loving.  Like a father.  They would have seen me as a tough kid because I didn’t cry, I carried on with the plans for the day.  We went to a restaurant and had a meal afterwards.  I took nothing for the pain, they did nothing for the sting, and I just carried on until it healed.  I remember thinking it made no sense since the bee headed straight for me.  It’s referenced in the Bourne Legacy, it’s not normal for wolves.

And who sits on a horse in statues?  That is the reason for horse references.  I will not be spoon-feeding you that information you will have to look it up or figure it out on your own.

Wolves, Wolf, this is all a reference to Little Red Riding Hood, and my grandmother who was killed with a stroke because Cherith gave US intelligence the information about how to stop BRAIN RESEARCH.

That double agent you showed me last night is in a Hunt club, or was formerly a member, a part of a hunt club.  He used to hunt people.  It is the reason for the movies, The Hunger Games.  He was given targets, hits, kills, people to hunt down because he is nothing more than a stupid double agent.  He was given information, he was manipulated, and he bought it.  Like a non-thinking, man.

The activities that he has participated in are also referenced in the movie, Fight Club.  I would have to watch the movie again to read it correctly, it is referenced only.

They read him correctly and saw he would enjoy killing people.  They gave him people to kill in exchange for services and other things.  I have yet to see any substance in this man.  And, he wanted to see me, badly because he wants me.  He doesn’t want to kill me, he wants me.  A sexy mind is what he sees in me.  He believes the interrogation technique that has been devised with my boyfriend is more effective than anything else he’s seen.  Effective.

The smashed desk in the movie A Beautiful Mind is the desk in the Oval Office of The White House.  I read this movie correctly the first time I saw it.  The reason it was made was to show people how Cherith’s mind and person makes better men out of already exceptional men.

When I saw the film I said to people, something must have happened in the director’s life because I see it in his filmmaking, it was a better film than anything he’d done so far.  I saw it in his filmmaking.  And, I am omitting people’s names on purpose.

The White House desk that is smashed tells me I prevented an assassination attempt on the President when we first moved to Oregon and lived in – Portland, not Gresham, Portland, Port, Portland.

They would have had a man watching me, I was playing in our front yard, I took my bicycle to the front porch and rode the steps on my bike.  I didn’t stay in my seat and I hit the bicycle part and started bleeding from my vagina.  My mother placed me in the tub to stop the bleeding, and I remember her being upset with me.  I did not understand why she was mad at me.  So, that tells me something was wrong.

He probably spoke a foreign language, the man who was watching me.  I see in his head he had no ill will toward me; however, he was after our President.  He might have spoken another language while I rode my bike down our front steps, he was working with a woman.  He would have been straight in front of our house and she was to the left.  It is probably the very reason for the show The Americans.  A marginal Secret Service, it is referenced in Sherlock.

He did not go through with the assassination attempt on our President after seeing me bleeding.  They killed my cat Shoo-Shoo because of it.  I would not still remember my mother telling me Shoo-Shoo was dead if there wasn’t anything else attached to it.  I still remember the room, I remember where I was, where my mother was, the fireplace, I remember everything.

It would be a reason why they worked so HARD to get another assignation attempt on US soil.  On US land.  Because I prevented one.

If you put the two together, the bleeding as a child and the prevention of the President assignation attempt, this would have been before Ronald Reagan was shot, and the cysts, and subsequent hysterectomy it is code for intelligence, and it is bad.  Never let this happen to another person again.

When a fire a mother will look to her child, from Sherlock this is many times in my life.  This goes together with the dialogue from the movie Point Break, young, dumb, and full of cum, you may have been in the top percent of your class, but you know exactly, SQUAT!  SQUAT!  Squat is code for the bracelet I chose of an intelligence man and the connection to a dead child case while I was still a child.  This is about my employment at Visionworks where he used the manager to talk to me, learning to speak Russian, going through a divorce, I reminded him of his mother, and the next thing I know my mother is at the store, and I am being moved to my family’s home, my mother telling me that conversation was sexual harassment, although I did not feel that way, rather than me living on my own with my own money.

It is referenced in Point Break during the drug bust and the undercover cop shows the FBI how they messed up, again.  And the thong underwear in the FBI raid is just about movie ratings, it is not intelligence.  It is just to get movie ratings and there is nothing wrong with that.

I had already moved up several positions at my employment at Visionworks, and the next steps would have been me as manager of the lab, and then store manager.  I would have been able to live on my own instead he sent me back to live with my parents as an adult because he wanted to work my mother through me.  What an idiot.

Take the cuffs off, leave ‘em on, take the cuffs off, LEAVE ‘EM ON from the movie, Point Break what this looks like is he was not deemed brain-workable enough for me by my intelligence father.  And my intelligence father is correct.  He had no idea how valuable I was and am.

Send In The Clowns, this song is code.  The word “ought” translates into a very top-secret military project that looks now defunct, sorta.  So, there is still something there that is workable.

Anonymous from Sherlock is referencing my tithing.  I tithed to charities and not just to my church.  If you know how to, you would receive intelligence from that.

Dugan from Dead President’s means my father was workable in California and stopped being so because he was placed on the night shift and it effected his mind and brain.  It is one thing I talked about over and over when we moved to Florida, how much better it was for my father to be in a day shift.  For his brain.  It is referenced in the movie, Remains Of The Day.

Is it unusual for a child to not speak until they are aged 2?  I did not speak audibly until I was 2 years of age.

The hallway to the pool hall in Dead President’s is in Solvang, California.

The reason for the show The Americans is not about Russian double agents in America, it is about subverting the efforts of US and British intelligence from working together.  Be careful you understand the difference.

There is something wrong here in this Normandy picture you’ve shown me.

Lost, I am Jack.  The code is, no J, for my brother, no K, a is for my father, and c for Cherith.  It would be the reason my mother loved the show so much because I am in it, a mother will look to her child.  The character Rose would be my mother because I was upset when I saw it.  It is about the loss and losses my mother has received because they stopped her from being loved over and over again.  Just like they stopped the plans to change her career in Oregon.  Where she would have been financially independent on her own.

Lost also has the repeating numbers.  I told you this Spanish royal man knows code in numbers.  The repeating numbers is also a distress signal.  It is the distress signal that is mentioned in Sherlock as isolated.  You people put on this show and have me “isolated” because you have no real idea about anything that pertains to me because it is for me to know and not you.  The hatch in Lost is space shuttles.  The people moving around the island, unexplainably is me, and my mind telling men locations, people, etc.  Winning the lottery is the same thing I’ve already written about; it is in Germany and a private man wanting to give intelligence me a way to live – for the rest of my life because of what I did in Dachau.

The distress signal is about people living on islands, I saw two islands in separate places.  Did you really find them?  When I heard what sounded like some of their voices, I wanted to meet them.  It saddened me because I will never be able to meet them, the way this life is set-up.  Did you really find the missing people?

I am Popeye, in the movie Popeye.  The song, He Loves Me, from Popeye, is, again, another nightgown.  I woke up in the middle of the night in Oregon because the wind was blowing.  I walked outside in my nightgown and the wind felt so good I stayed and walked around for just a little while.  No one was watching, or so I thought, and why wouldn’t I enjoy the beautiful breeze.  Most likely, there is a military victory I helped with sometime before that.  Intelligence father.  Loving like a father.  Like a father loves his daughter.

The director of Popeye is not my favorite because he did not have his actors carefully enunciate his words.  What country is known for proper diction and enunciation as a part of their culture?  However, The Player started a brain-click, yes.  Do you know why?  Do you want to know why?  The background.  The whole movie, the entire movie is in the background.  How very interesting, if you look for it.

Wow, I guess six hours is enough writing for today, but it is not everything I know.

You just – all my life – you just couldn’t respect my mind and brain?

Atrocious.

 

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 4, 2019

If you’ve ever had a proper pot of hot tea made properly where the pot is warmed with hot water before the boiling water and tea are placed in the pot to steep, then you will never want warmed-over, microwaved iced tea, will you dad?  And you will tell them so if you see them in the restaurant microwaving iced tea after you’ve placed an order for hot tea, you will tell them what hot tea is since they must not know the difference.  If you do not have the means to make boiling water, then you cannot make hot tea.  If you do not have tea leaves, or tea bags, then you cannot make hot tea.  And, you will get your money back, or leave the restaurant if you have not yet paid because they did not know there was such a thing as hot tea before my father and I walked into the restaurant, after my father told them how to properly prepare hot tea, they did not have the means or the way to make hot tea.  They did not have the correct ingredients.  They had not tea leaves or tea bags.  Microwaved iced tea will never be hot tea.  Hot tea is hot tea.  And where I am from, how I grew up tea was always hot, the only cold tea or iced tea, is iced tea.  When asking for tea it is always a hot cup of tea unless you specify, iced.

I am already in another time crunch to get to work on time.  I actually do not like being late.  My parents because of – as I see it in my mind’s eye now – communication problems were late in getting us to church, a lot.  People would have noticed that it bothered me.  I didn’t like sneaking into church so as not to disturb the other people, and quietly sitting down.  I like being able to leisurely walk into church with my head held high being able to look around and take my time.  There is a lot in that paragraph if you are able to read it.  It is beyond the words.

I believe, every time, I have been placed with a man to work since Florida, it has been for the benefit and experience of the man, and not me.  It was to make the men, better men.  I already had my experience and training, I saved men in Vietnam, I helped intelligence end the Vietnam war.  I already had the experience and training.  It has always been for the betterment of men.  Cherith loves men, not women.  It is proven I will make better men out of men even if they are already exceptional.  My boyfriend is proof of that.  And, people have subverted efforts going back to when we lived in California to stop me from having male relationships as there was a neighborhood boy, a friend of my brothers who wanted to date me and take me to the – movies.

My first “boyfriend,” my first boyfriend who asked me to go steady when we were in elementary school together, his family moved in less than a few months.  Do you see the pattern, yet?

Did you see the pattern or were you too bored from Sherlock is not directed to me at me, it is directed to United Stated intelligence?

A small detail such as the one left out in my writing yesterday is a very good example of why I do not rush, or hurry any of my writing.  My writing carries more weight and value than most anything else you are doing here.  I wrote yesterday that my brother is not in Sherlock after I’ve written I’m gay and that’s about my brother, and a few other details, like halitosis.  He is not in any of the characters, I see it in my head, he is in the dialogue.  That would again lead you to the double agent, the dumb-dumb, using my brother to get to me.  It is a big difference that would cause a time delay in a working field if you do not get the details correct.

The table conversation between Miss Adler and Mycroft Holmes is a lot of things, one of them being it is the conversation between my mother and I about getting Thursday and adopting Thursday the cat.  I am Mycroft and my mother, Miss Adler, we were sitting in the exact places in our home as well.  He was to be my mother’s cat.  It was her intention for him to be her cat.  She liked her cats to sleep in her room during the night, and Thursday just wanted to be wherever, so he became my cat after about a month.

It means Thursday is a code name for an agent still working and it looks like people figured that out, and who took care of my cats by taking them away from me?  I do not like dumb-dumbs.  I do not like double agents.

I am out of time for today.

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 3, 2019

As I can barely move to get out of bed today, I think people have not yet realized what you have been displaying and putting on for the world to see.  When I looked around at work last night, I saw not a man to my left, not a man to my right, not a man in front of me, not a man behind me, not a man working WITH me – anywhere!

When I first started working there, men were around, and now they have all been replaced with women.  It is not female empowerment.  It specifically shows now that the United States military will not work with a woman and will not work with Cherith.

You have men around telling me what to do, go here, go there, do this, do that, but NOT A ONE OF YOU?  NOT A ONE HAVE ANY BALLS OR ENOUGH BALLS TO WORK WITH ME?!  NOT ONE OF YOU?!  THE WORK I DO THAT IS NOT HEAD WORK, THE WORK I DO PACKING IS SO HARD NOT A SINGLE MAN IS WILLING TO WORK WITH ME AND DO THE SAME AMOUNT OF LABOR-INTENSIVE HARD WORK AS ME?!  NOT ONE?!  NOT ONE!  OH YEAH, THEY’LL STAND IN MY EYE LINE MOVING CARTS AROUND, BUT NOT A ONE OF YOU – SINCE – I’VE WORKED THERE IS WILLING TO WORK THE SAME AMOUNT OF HOURS, THE SAME DAYS, AND THE SAME WORK!  NOT ONE!

I don’t think you people have understood how destructive something as simple as not having any men around Cherith really is.  What exactly are balls?  What exactly are stored and housed in balls?  In testes?  Is it sperm everyone?  Yes, it is sperm that is stored in testes.  So, what exactly do you think it looks like when no man has the balls to work with me on the floor anywhere?  Impotent.  I could go on, but I am already running out of time before work.  The word is impotent.  You should be asking why someone wants our intelligence men to look impotent over and over, for years.

Impotent.

Well, I am not the one that is doing that to you, and you are doing it to yourselves.

That job is too fucking hard not a single man in willing to work the hours I do, for the pay I do, not a one.  Let alone drive an hour there and back.  Then, at home write and type for hours, then get some sleep, and do it all over again.  This has nothing to do with performance.  This is a way to remove intelligence that has been given to me since my birth.  They gave it to me.  I have never sought it.  They given it to me for a reason.

I love that them there man like he is my master from the movie Up reads, I love that them there man like I love God.  I love that man, I love my handler, like I, Cherith loves God.  Master is not literal it is meant to reference God.  A dog is a loyal animal, just like Cherith is a very loyal woman.

So beautiful.  You have a man who thinks and believes I, Cherith Joelle Gjestland, am so beautiful.  It is referenced in Sherlock as Miss – and Miss is meant to tell the world Cherith has never been married – Adler places her hand after the phone call that changed a mind, places her hand over a newspaper.

You have no idea who he is.  None of you do.  He is very high up, and he is very well connected.

They have some very skilled, very good readers.  I have seen it in my mind’s eye.  They have some readers that are better than a good deal of what you have show me and placed in front of me, and they KNOW WHO I AM!

What you show every day at work is you people have no idea who I am!

He thinks I am so beautiful.  It is not sexual in such a way, as you people start thinking more like strip clubs instead of nuanced conversations that create arousal.  However, he, the man who thinks I am so beautiful would see me in a more respectful manner.  It is a matter of respect for what I have accomplished, and he would not have known things like the Vietnam war.

He thinks I am so beautiful.  Do you like the moustache they drew on me?  Do you like the chin hairs they drew on me?  Do you think in any way creating dark circles, chin hairs, a moustache in any way is helping any of our intelligence?!  It isn’t.  It won’t.

If that man I helped rescue in Vietnam had a stroke after 2011, it was done intentionally.  He was made to have a stroke, a stroke is a brain-message, saying this man, this woman, is a thinker, and it is the sort of thing that is referenced in Sherlock of, she got in touch.  She wasn’t taking money, just like in Sherlock, she was getting information that is more valuable than money, most of the time, in intelligence.

Be aware, I have yet to see my real brother anywhere in Sherlock.  That would be on purpose, intentionally, to show they – the Brits, the English think better of my brother than most of the people they have seen here in the States, and that has to do with how you have set-up my life here all these years.

If he prayed with you it was to show you, he was aligning himself with me, in a manner of speaking.  I wrote about respect and other faiths.  Resect is the closest word, but in their culture, respect is multi-faceted.  It is more than just one word.  It is a feeling, an emotion, it is understanding, it is more than I can write this quickly.

They, and it is more like, 98, 99, 99.999999% of them would have more respect for me than ANYONE has ever given me credit for, realizes, or has understood because I SEE IT!  I KNOW IT’S TRUE!  More respect for me and I am a woman!

It feels good to break the rules sometimes, I forget the movie this at the moment my head is a little full, is has intelligence in there somewhere, it feels good to break the rules sometimes, do you know what it is telling people?  They used a child to end the Vietnam war.  Would you have rather waited until I was of legal age to be worked by intelligence?  Sometimes it is acceptable to break the rules.  Like showing all the intelligence work I have done in movies and television.

To be specific the New Years Eve garage in NYE 2018.  If he did it just for attention, I need him gone.  More importantly, what is a man that I used to date doing around me when I have a boyfriend now?  It’s inappropriate.

Why do I have soggy underwear?

If he is waiting on me it should be telling you that he wants me to have an official military badge, and be sent over there, pretty much.  He thinks I am more than worthy.

Before anyone does something so stupid as sending me to HR for making noise in the bathroom, I was just trying to get out of the stall.  I have a vest and the back brace, it just got caught on the door, and the door slammed.  Get over yourselves, people!

Those questions you put on the computer everyday are a no-win situation – ever, that is why I chose not to answer.

I am out of time for today.

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 2, 2019

The sky reads this afternoon that I am not, that no one believes I am your weapons of mass destruction.

I do not trust him 100%.  I have been burned too many times.  I do not trust him 100% and that is why I broke up with him.

I understand he needs to see my reactions to be able to work how he works; however, he has not given authority to others around me to give me an allowance for my behavior.  My behavior that is perfectly logical and reasonable considering the people I am managing – that I am managing.  I do not trust him, that’s why I broke up with him.

Yes, one man I trust, one man I do not trust.  Yes, one man defers to me, one man does not.  One man is in one parking lot, the other is not.

Once he has worked me by creating a reaction that HE needs to see for him to be able to read me, then decipher it for the situation and circumstances he is working on, I then see how other’s around me are seeing me because they have no real idea of what is going on.  Well, I don’t think they should know what is going on either.  It is none of their concern.  Got it?  None of your concern.  Stop being busy-bodies, curiosity seekers.

Since no one else will do it, since no one else has had the balls to tell anyone, I have been above your paygrade and securities clearances – as a child, that’s why.

You couldn’t just take the approach that you wanted to rest my head.  Concerned that I was working too hard.  Thoughtful of my head.  Because that approach would have created a different reaction, and you make it appear that no one has any idea how valued my brain, thinking, and head are to other people.

They’ve attacked people on US soil – land – to show you how important and valuable I am.  If I am valuable to them, you should be paying attention because it is NOT because I am disloyal to the United States government.  Obviously, only a dumb-dumb would think and suspect, and cause doubt in such a way about me or my mother.  Only a dumb-dumb.

I was asked to make a deal.  I was asked to make a deal yesterday and the only way I could do so was to take time off of work for reasons more closely related to food poisoning.  I shouldn’t have to protect myself in this way by writing this – in advance.  It should already be understood.

She got in touch from Sherlock, this is about the removal of my mole that was above my left eye.  Take that risk, is referring to giving my mother strokes.  Some data is always recoverable, take that risk because the data was no longer recoverable, she was no longer workable, I see it.  Her house fell through the clouds, she was no longer workable, and she was MY mother not yours.

Someone wants to make it appear that they were using strokes on my mother to send me messages about bombs, or bombers, or attacks that I – prevented.  This person is obviously dumb, stupid, moronic, and probably a dumb-dumb and they do not know it.  It looks like it has a connection to my brother.

It’s too well written from 12 Strong is about me in my writing class at college that I took at a different campus from my theater classes.  It reads – it is too well written it can’t be…Cherith…Cherith can’t really be the weapons of mass destruction.  It is too well written it can’t be…in reference to my teacher’s at school, their influence was not what helped my brain.  It is too well written it can’t be…I took a long weekend from work and drove to Atlanta, stayed at a hotel, and went to an amusement park, and drove back home.  I went with another girl from college, and my brother met us there in Atlanta.  Her father, the girl from college, I never met, and I was always suspicious of whatever she wasn’t telling me made me suspicious.  It could be innocent since no one has understood me being the weapons of mass destruction did not mean I was ever going to attack my own country.

My travelling, around the world and anywhere – gets noticed.

It means you picked somebody up somewhere near Atlanta because I was there, and they followed me.  Most likely, he is American, American-born, and was working for the terrorists.  He was passable because he was born American.  He probably has some military experience; he was probably released from the military.  He would not have gotten far with them.  I am sure I would be able to identify him now, after all this time, 2002, even though I’ve only seen a glimpse or glance of him in 2002.  Got it?

How many other people do you know working as a Rubbermaid have the brain ability to make a person and remember them.

I have no idea what you people want from me; it is completely inconsequential how I drive – anywhere.  Whether I drive one direction or another is completely inconsequential in my mind.  It is my mind that matters regardless if you believe in me or not, and what you show me at work – everyday – what you show is no one believes in me.  You put me down and belittle me every day there.  That’s why we’ve broken up.

Get over yourselves people.  I live in Florida and it is hot here everyday with the exception of a few days a year.  It is year-round shorts weather and it has nothing to do with a man.  Also, I only have so many clothes.

I was in the Army, you were a doctor from Sherlock means they probably used me with a doctor to solve things, and it does not look too successful of a match, it didn’t last long.  It looks like someone wrote a quick email and gave the man the assignment.  As if that is enough when dealing with brains like mine.  A quick email.

I have a boyfriend now; I keep writing it for a reason.  You people need to stop promoting me as a sex fantasy for other men.  That is not who I am.  That may be how some other agents work in the field it has never been my approach and it has never been who I am and – that’s – why I am the Weapons of Mass destruction, and not you, or your Soul.  Copy?

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

June 2, 2019

Something’s been wrong in my mind since June 1, 2019 around 7am Eastern time.  I don’t know what you people are doing, but something is still wrong.

From what I’ve seen they want the New Year’s Eve garage removed from me – for his protection.  That is intel I am giving you, and they are giving you.  They want him removed from me – for his protection.  Got it?  Because that sentence is saying more than what is there.

Real.

Also, I have a boyfriend now, there is no reason anyone other than my boyfriend should be around.  The very reason he is my boyfriend – he actually listens to me, and then changes courses of action to stop me from being unhappy.  My boyfriend is not my father, duh.  My father is my father, duh.

From what I’ve read in the sky they are not stopping.  Do you want to know why, or do you want to send innocent men and women into battles, fights, and wars until the end of time?  What is the question you are actually asking of me?  Do you know?  Do you want my help at all?

Do you want to know what I observed on the dock on my break tonight?  People have found a way to make a living of not really working, and they are using me to do so.  Keeping me as a slave while they get to give “orders and directions” to make it appear as though it could be a real workplace.

Why is every person on the dock with their own personal pushcart trash bin?  The same pushcart they’ve used to stop me from walking on the “green mile.”  Do you actually know what they are doing on the dock?  Beyond shrink wrap, and me seeing duplicate persons?

From what I’ve seen and read they are still upset and unhappy and mostly it is dealing with my financial situation.  I’ve also seen they are not happy with the amount of respect and deference that is never shown to me in that building.  Never.  Everyone else gets to tell me what to do in that building – even if it is not true and incorrect – and I have no authority whatsoever.

From what I’ve read they are looking for confirmation.  There was a warning from what I read.  Also, it says there is a competition.  That is what it says.

Am I your commander, or am I not?  Am I your Captain, or am I not?  Am I your Weapons of Mass Destruction, or am I not?  Because you are not working me that will show, display, and give understanding that – anyone – has acknowledged the fact that the code name Weapons of Mass Destruction was given to me.

I think he needs to be aware that I know what it is we do every day.  I know he believes in me more than he’s shown.  Yet, a straightforward approach (without tainted air) to communications will give him better results.  I cannot believe what I saw in the store tonight.  It is a disgrace to our military.

They still see I have bulbous thighs.  They still see I have a gut that hangs over my belt.  They still see I am carrying my brother’s weight on me.  They would not do that to me, and it is working against you.

Do you want my help or not?  Then, stop taking authority away from me.

They will listen to me more than most of your men, I’ve seen it.  They will listen to me.  They will listen to me more than most of your men.  So, do you want my help or not?

I have a boyfriend and he does not share me, nor do I share him.  Do you want him to beat up these other men and women who are trying to put claim on me by fattening me up, and soaking my underwear?

I am disgusted at present.

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

May 31, 2019

This is something I would not normally write about, and quite frankly I would dismiss someone’s behavior once I’ve seen it since it cannot and does not pertain to me; it is such an unkind thing to do and say; however, this tall fat blonde woman you have walking around here with an overweight golden retriever tells me, she thinks I am stupid and dumb, and incapable of thinking on my own or for myself.  Wow.  What a dumb thing to do.  Does anyone want to agree with this woman?  It says more about her and how she thinks and feels about herself than it does about me.

You would have permanently disabled any uplink, from Sherlock is my mother’s disabled parking hang tag.  Something while driving or while parked people would have been able to spot, quickly.

One of those law things from Sherlock pertains to me being a child as I was working.  Well, it worked didn’t it?

What’s it need a title for from Sherlock means why are you using the people Cherith works with as proxies to speak to her?  You are not going to get the same result by doing so.

Isolated from Sherlock means rescue missions that have not yet happened.  POW’s still missing looks like can be found.

The Abominable Bride where Sherlock’s brother bets with Sherlock about eating, getting fat and gaining weight.  Do you know what this really says?  What this really says to intelligence?  What this really says from British intelligence about United States intelligence?  They couldn’t possibly be screaming at you any louder.

Do you have any idea why there is so much intelligence is the Sherlock series?  Do you know what they are saying about United States intelligence?  Has anyone other than me really looked at it?

They are showing you and telling you what dumb, hillbilly, redneck mentalities you have here in intelligence and handling me.  It’s atrocious.  It is vile, it is disgusting, and it is true.

I would never want for our own intelligence to be portrayed and such simple MORONS!  You have had the source of power for the Weapons of Mass destruction, and you’ve allowed it, meaning me, to be used as a vending machine.  For television.  For entertainment.  What a stupid thing to do.

Lord knows what has actually happened in the intelligence field during these television “directed” years while I’ve been trying to recover my own brain.  It’s a huge mistake.

I am not sure I can accurately portray and write the obscenely, grotesque version of me you’ve shown to the world through the eyes of intelligence and intelligence minds when you’ve had the power all along and you’ve never used it.

Why do you think I’ve worked so well with the Brits and in Asia?  Has anyone thought and asked questioned about the reason they’ve used me in locations?  I am not some country bumpkin.  There is a reason I don’t have exaggerated facial expressions.  You’ve done that to me by telling me it’s for a television show.

It is a grotesque portrayal; it is a mirror image back to US intelligence.  I would never have done that to you people in the field.  I cannot truly describe and write how bad it looks in some minds.  I cannot tell you how serious a mistake this looks to them.

I have a boyfriend.

Weapons of Mass Destruction.

Wow.

AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY!

 

May 31, 2019

I am really sick and tired of all the mixed messages I get around here and at work.  Really sick and tired of it.  Fucking angry at having to wade through other people’s bullshit and dramas just to make them feel better.  I’m really sick and tired of it.

Listen up!  I have a boyfriend.  I have a boyfriend if it is in my mind alone.  I have a boyfriend and he is committed to me; he is not sleeping with other women.  He is not married.  He only has eyes for me.  He is only interested in me, and that is one reason he is my boyfriend.  I no longer have to reference him by writing the real Hannibal Lecter, he is my boyfriend.  The real Hannibal Lecter is my boyfriend.  You will receive intel from this paragraph alone that will go on for a while.

Quite honestly, David needs to see me in a committed relationship with a man I love and who loves me and see me happy.  He’s been lied to.  He needs to see me happy with another man because he also has been lied to.

The last thing I need is a public image from Sherlock is referencing my employment at WORSHIP, it was televised, then my brother was in his car accident, and the World Trade Center was bombed again.  It makes it appear that people believed it was deemed too risky to have me on television, so accessible because they still did not quite understand the intel they were receiving.

In my mind, my pen was still at home.  My stylus pen was still at home.  It is one reason; I do not change.  I do not change things around, so that I do not forget.  It is one of the things you people have taken away from me by calling it a television show, and I am being “directed.”  When all it is doing is showing a false version of the real me.

Realize that the scene in The Matrix of Morpheus being rescued by helicopter is me, Cherith rescuing a POW, he would have been a very high commander in the military during the Vietnam war.  Cherith rescued a grown man whilst still a child.

We are not a couple from the Sherlock means people were believing that how I was being used in intelligence was preventing me from getting married and having relationships in my real life, and they did not want or wish to see me unhappy in this way.

She got in touch from Sherlock just means that since the time I went to the office building just like in The Matrix and told people how to destroy brain-research there has been at least one woman who has been black-mailing people with and for information.  Black mail is not the only word, it has been a way to extract information because no one has had the balls to say, tell, and give me the true meaning and definition of my work and employment.  Therefore, leaving it open to black mail people for the information and worse.

I want don’t want you to help, I want you safe from the movie, Up is both myself and another intelligence handler not wanting my brother to help with my work.  It does not mean that neither of us didn’t think a lot about my brother it just means there is more that is involved that can be explained in so many words.  It is mostly instinct.

For instance, in the movie, Love Actually when Mark is at the wedding and the dialogue involves the word, gay, this is about my brother.  This is another admirer of me using my brother to read my mood by looking at my brother.  My brother may or may not remember all the people because they probably disguised themselves.  Most this was done when my brother was at the University of South Florida.

You should receive intel from these purchases: Michelob Ultra cans, Corona Extra cans, falafel burger – as this was a black US military man that gave me a falafel mix when I worked at Dillard’s he would have had no idea or understood the reason he was asked to do so.  You will find this goes back to a powerful family, well-connected, diligent, not deceptive, and there is a connection to me when I lived in Gresham, Oregon.  That is another foothold, I am giving you.  Dark horse rose can, you will find, and it will surprise what and who is connected to that purchase.  Yuengling cans, he needs to be removed, he is only around to upset me, make me angry, he has no concept of what real love is and feels like – none.  The cold coffee cans are only for the color, she is ended in my mind.  I do not deal with double agents.  It is one reason I work so well in the Middle East, in that region, and with persons of other faiths.  Art beer cans, you will find something from this also.

Did my father really receive a phone call congratulating him on having an excellent daughter?

Read her masthead from Sherlock, most people should get this by now.  Read her, mast – sail, another word for military, head.  Read her head, she is telling you to pay her, to pay me.  Why else do you think Jason Bourne from the movie, Bourne Identity, has so much money in a safe deposit box bank in Germany?  Do you not understand what private citizens were doing by wanting to set me up financially stable and independent?  Do you think they were doing this – just for me?  This person knew, these people knew, I was going to be worked, it was a gift they were going to give to the United States, to United State military, to the United States government, and to the United States intelligence, and people prevented it – just for the other side to have a better advantage, and guess what happened?  9/11.

There could be code in the term, 9/11.  It could reference 9, my birth month, intelligence given to me, 1 being me, and another 1 being, most likely, E.

You people really need to understand the consequences of doing things like asking me to change the Guardian sign, or change my screen images, or change my driving route, or nearly any request you people have asked of me since 2014.  What you are doing and showing people by doing so, is telling the whole world that I, Cherith Joelle Gjestland must take responsibility and bear the burden of harm done to me by others.

Not that the persons and people who have done the harm to me have to take responsibility, you are showing people, I am responsible for people balding me, facial hair on me, weight gain on me, crimes criminals have done, the real criminals are not being dealt with as responsible for their own actions.  You are grossly, misinformed upon me.

I read the map.  It was an impossible mission that inspired the movie 12 Strong.  Impossible.  From what they showed me, and the places they encountered trouble, they would have had to retreat, and they would not have made it out alive.  None of them.

They made it across.  They made it, and they made it across because of me.  All of them, everyone of them would have died, there, in a foreign country.  But I got them out – safe.

So, I am really sick and tired of being treated like a nothing at my employment.  I am really tired of it.  I am really unhappy there.  And, I am tired of pussyfooting around other people’s feelings whilst I have to live without my mother, without any human contact, without any personal friendships, without a normal, real life anymore.  I am fucking sick of it.  Sick of pussyfooting around other people’s emotions and feelings while no one shows any regard for my own.

And I am sick of working a nightshift!  You don’t support me in my employment, and I am sick of it!

If you people because you’ve had a security cameras job, or been supervisors in my employment and seen the intelligence men who work me (that people were not supposed to discuss) while I am working in my employment and thought you understood what was going on and why and what people were talking to me about – you’ve been wrong.

And imaginative range from Sherlock is about finding my mother on the floor with a stroke while working for Disney, so somehow, someone wanted to implicate Disney, family, and family values, and my homosexual brother.

I protect my brother just by being alive, and probably when I die, if he is still alive, I would still protect him because of who I am.  There is nothing that can take away a family connection, not even death.  So, if you think I will be rearranging my garage, you can fuck off.  I won’t.  I am done changing things as simple as how I park my car when it has no real intelligence attached to it.

I’ll just have your lighter from Sherlock, that’s me, showing people, I know who you are, I am Sherlock, I will find you, I will destroy you, I will get you, I know you.

I know you don’t smoke, but your employer does from Sherlock that’s me showing people David was not my handler, and he worked for me.  It is one reason people wanted me to be financially independent, they wanted me seen as the person who was waited upon and not the person behind the counter waiting on others.  How else is it that these people work?  It is about culture.

Smoke, smoking, cigarettes, mostly this is just code, smoke can also be fog, pertaining to London, it can also mean memory-loss, and non-workable.

Despised her in the end from Sherlock is about David.  He despised her in the end, won’t even call her by her name.  It reads, David despised Cherith when he went to University, he won’t even call her.  David had all my personal contact information.  He had my personal phone number, my email, he knew where I lived, and he chose not to call me himself.  He called me at work, whereas a professional I would not speak to him personally.  He despised me, and I am tired of living this lie for you people.

12 Strong looks like it happened after I travelled to Australia during summer break from school before the attacks on September 11^th, 2001.  When I was in school, I knew something was wrong, after the attacks while performing in my theater classes and in ASL classes, it presented itself as nervousness when I knew that was neither true or correct.  It is simply because I could not believe I am such an important person.

When I say run, you run from Sherlock is also me saving my brother’s life, more than once, it is many people’s lives, I’ve saved.

I am really sick and tired of having to worry about my employment.  Being made to be fearful of whether or not I will have a job or employment – anymore.  I am over it, anymore.

He told me in HR that I enjoyed upsetting people because of all the complaints they’ve received in HR.  It is a lie.  I am done being made to fear – writing the truth.

I like brains, I like military brains, it is obvious.

I am tired of voluntary time, of unpaid worked time.  I am done writing for today.  You people need me so much, yet you do not provide a way to keep me financially stable.  You over-work me and it is obvious.

I am applying to nearly every job and employment that comes across my computer because I am so unhappy.  Do not read anything more into it.  Since it does not exist.

They wanted dramatic weight-loss on me, to see on me.  That is what they wanted to see, not one pound at a time, they wanted me to be seen as I used to be.  It was actually important enough to them, they started fighting for it.  You still don’t understand who I am to them.  They wanted me back to the weight I was about a year ago.  It was important enough they started fighting.  Are you paying attention, yet?

You don’t understand how it is they see me just because I am a woman.  That’s dumb on you people.  I am more important to them than you’ve understood.  It’s personal.

Do you think they started a war for religious reasons?  No.  It’s personal.  Pay attention.  I am giving this to intelligence.  I am giving it away, freely.  Respect.  Of course.

I have a boyfriend.  He is committed to me.  He wants me.  He wants to be the best man he can be because he loves me.