Everything over these last few years has been nothing more than an unbearable combination of hurry up, and then hurry up some more!
Hurry up and wake up, hurry up and eat breakfast, hurry up and get some clothes on, hurry up and go to work, hurry up and work, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry some more, faster, faster, faster, you are not going fast enough at work – GO FASTER, hurry up and not eat lunch of food of any kind while at work, hurry up and drive home, hurry up and clean the cat litter, hurry up and feed my cats, hurry up and take out the trash, hurry up and finally eat – but, do it quickly and hurry, hurry up and go to sleep, hurry up while sleeping, hurry up and wake up, so you can do it all over again.
My mind is gone because of it. Parts of my personality have completely vanished.
Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, this constant hurry, this constant demanding expectation is depressing and oppressive.
Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
Everything is too fast, it is too high, the numbers are too high, it is more than a person is able to function normally.
Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
Ugh! Is it no wonder it is all I can do on my days off but lie in bed, and dream about a time when what I wanted actually was heard, and listened too, and mattered.
This life is not my dream, nor is it any semblance of what I want or wanted in life.