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October 27, 2018
Before people have the chance to go script crazy, I have always said this before and I have said this numerous times to numerous people since I have been in this house that I see better, with greater clarity, with better detail, and distance with contacts rather than glasses.
It has been done with purposeful manipulation that my vision is altered creating this false impression that I need glasses.
It has nothing to do with vision.
It has nothing to do with glasses or contacts.
It has nothing to do with anything other than creating a false perception of me.
Yes David, I see you are beginning to understand how this computer program has created some terrible things that have nothing to do with entertainment. Terrible falsehoods, terrible perceptions, terrible terribleness that cannot be put into words.
I see this woman who was in her late forties in 2010. She grew up upper middle class. Her income has been middle to upper middle class her whole life. Her income has fluctuated. Both she and her husband have had wage reductions at their employment due to performance reviews. She and her husband met at University, they have never been really in love. She is grossly unhappy in her marriage. She is overweight, plus-size overweight, she was not in college. She was not thin either, she was just under plus-size at University. She feels as though she is actually poverty-poor when their wages were reduced to middle class. This is way she has me doing things like cleaning the gunk out of my appliances. Something she has never done. She has paid people to do that sort of work for her. She probably created this program, she created it before I lost weight. Something that probably made her angry in a way she has not dealt with, acknowledged, or spoken about. I see it in the way Rob spoke to me about getting skinny.
They have never had passion in their marriage. She has never experienced the mouth agape, grabbing a man because you cannot get his groin close enough, she has never made walls tumble, they have never made the earth still because of what exists between the two of them. Make no mistake this, that sort of love, love like that is essential in this world. It is one of the greatest weapons mankind has in this world.
She and her husband have made gross mistakes. They have not used good judgement in many, many ways.
Be aware that the weight pressure that is placed on me at work is about “Casey” and her dim-witted friends relieving their guilt about their drug use. It has nothing to do with me.
You’re gonna want to look around at the last place I had my eyes examined in Plant City. They were two gay men. The doctor wanted me to go to a specialist for a hole in one eye. I never went.
There are some really sick people who have let this happen simply because of how I looked because of my appearance. Then, when my appearance became better than their own, prettier, slimmer, more attractive than they went crazy in creating bags under my eyes, bruises, darkness, sun damage, facial hair, bloating, constipation, on and on. It is sick.
If anyone thought that me writing about flowers was in any way feminine, I need you to stop reading. You are not qualified. My writing is not for everyone, it is not a free for all, or I wouldn’t have a disclaimer. Before more innocent people get hurt, I need you to stop reading.
Know this, the only thing they have done with my bloated skin is slow me down. I am not stronger. I was better before. You have allowed them to do nothing but weaken me. Amazon has done nothing but weaken me.
I was better before.
Yes, I am very aware of the danger I have been placed in. It will never go away. Very aware.
I will not be looking in the mirror anymore.
Bank on this, I am no longer able to see people as I used to. It simply doesn’t happen anymore. Isolation. Teacher-training. Years of isolation. Think about that for a moment.